Key To Music Grades

A - You will never be whole without it
B - Highly recommended
C - Flawed, but still pretty good
D - It's your money, not mine
F - Why couldn't this have been burned in Fahrenheit 451?

Monday, April 5, 2010

Two Minutes Hate

For those unaware of what this is, please read here briefly for an explanation.

Eric fucking Clapton is a wanking tired third-rate claptrap of a bluesplayer. If he could suck his own dick, he would slobber over it slowly like a worn blues lick he got caught in-between his teeth. He's overrated and if he had children, his most notable abortion would be SRV and his insistence that you hear the same 'ol blues, but faster! And then when he plays it fast-like and you ooh and you ahhh and you gimme some more moloko, he's plays the same damn thing again, but faster! OMFG. The only thing worse than this bastard's blistering blues is no blues, no soul, check-my-shades-bitch Satriani, who could probably lose a battle of emoticons texting with himself, just because he'd get confused on the origins of a smile or a wink or anything with a fucking soul.


Jeff said...

One of the best posts I've read in a long time. If Clapton is God, then I feel bad for humanity. I've been meaning to post the most overrated artists in music for some time now, and Clapton just may stand at the very top - SRV and Satch would also be on that list for their souless garbage. I really don't understand what people see in Clapton; sure, Cream was great, but that was one isolated moment out of a long history of major snooze-fests. He's a total self-indulgent bore.

Dan said...

I wont honor your diatribe with a comment because whatever I say will be shot down to hell. LOL You know how I feel already and anyone who feels different than me is just plain wrong!

Dan said...

Oh wait, maybe I will say something. At least he isn't fourth rate.

The Mad Hatter said...


That would be a very good post. I always think lists like that stir up the pot, and it's nice because it really does put everything in perspective when you suddenly have a dozen people arguing over this or that.


Dude, you have good taste in music, and we overlap on numerous occasions in our faves, but I'm at loss of words otherwise for how to explain how much this awful man has drenched my ears with his dreck and how I find it difficult for anyone to find joy in his banality.

Master Cianan said...


holy shit, the satriani emoticon zing was beyond belief.

and just for the record, Clapton had a kid, but as Anal Cunt wrote in their song title, "Conor Clapton killed himself because his dad sucks".

oh yeah, Kaki King is gonna play up the street from me in a month. And her new album's out in a week.

TeXX said...

Well played sir. Well played. I was just arguing with a co-worker about the hot garbage Clapton puts down, now I have to have him read this haha.