Key To Music Grades

A - You will never be whole without it
B - Highly recommended
C - Flawed, but still pretty good
D - It's your money, not mine
F - Why couldn't this have been burned in Fahrenheit 451?

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Two Minutes Hate












For those unaware of what this is, please read here briefly for an explanation.

Fucking Bono he's so cool he once gave the Pope his signature Armani sunglasses but not cool enough to reward those who fill his eternally deep coffers with tickets for his large stupid impersonal shows. Hey fuckbag perhaps if you took those rosy rubies off you'd realize your efforts to bring quote awareness end quote to third world countries is as stupid as thinking that if you drop a truckload of cash onto a pile of horseshit that at the end of the day it'll be gone when all you'll really have is horseshit covered with cash and flies you third-rate Geldof crony. Fuck you and offer a real solution, not some altruistic self-congratulatory nightcap you give to temper your megalomaniacal assbag tendencies.

9 comments:

Jeff said...

Bono should start by giving me two GA tickets for his upcoming show with Muse.

Cinnamon Girl said...

What Jeff said. And Green Day needs to cough up too. WTF ...does Portland smell or something. I get NO FUCKING GROUPS I WANT. Damn Rancid too.

Anonymous said...

Jeff,

I'm hoping Muse has more shows; it be a shame if having lost in the competition for U2 tickets we lost out on seeing Muse.

Starr,

I swear one of two things happens: 1) they purposely taunt a city by leaving them out only to really cash in the next time or 2) these bands hate playing certain cities and they just can't outright say it

Master Cianan said...

You should do this more.

The Ripple Effect said...

Ain't it fun to blow your lid every once in a while?!

Anonymous said...

Master Cianan,

It had been more than 8 months I think since the last. I'm still steaming, but I'm gonna get back to basics now.

Ripple,

Actually, at the time, no. Ask Master Cianan, who asked that I jot down my 15 minute telephone rant into its now truncated 2 minute form. I was pretty mad, and I said fuck alot more.

Master Cianan said...

The original version of this rant was far more caustic. You know how in the movie "Alien" their blood eats through the floors? That's how concentrated and and hate-filled his rant was. I think if it had been recorded and played back for Bono, he'd have no choice but to kill himself, it was such a clean hit, and so fervent. His ego could never have stood the strain.

Anonymous said...

Yeah man; it was a glorious impromptu freewheeling diatribe. I honestly wish there was a way to have saved and savored it for posterity. One of my finest verbal outbursts, to be sure, punctuated by your maniacally satisfied laughter. I also thought it was funny afterwards that you just let me go, never interjected, never a simple yeah, you just laughed and let me implode. We have such fantastic memories of shit exploding don't we? And by that I am referring to several things.

Anonymous said...

Perhaps a retelling of the soda can splat is in due order.